- First there was shock
Then horror, then devastation.
It was the saddest day in the history of Angelus.
- Obviously he was a champion surfer.
The best in Angelus.
Probably, the best in the world.
Good times, man.
Good times.
- I just can't believe he's gone.
There's never gonna be a boy as handsome as Lockie Leonard.
Even if he didn't have big muscles.
Big muscles are overrated.
Except for like--
- Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut!
- What are you doing?
- What is this?
- What are you doing?
This is Lockie's fantasy.
- The sound stinks, lighting sucks,
- So? There's nothing we can do about it.
We only exist in his head.
- Lockie, if you're out there, this has to stop.
Get out of the way.
This has to stop, alright?
- Okay, okay.
So I didn't die.
But I did have a very sore finger.
Rewind.
I'm down at Profit Heads.
Perfect beach, perfect waves, perfect everything.
Except Curtis Ferraris, the scariest guy in school.
Curtis had a few reasons to hate my guts.
Sunday he's had this party.
It started out okay, but when Curtis decided
to break into the bowling alley
to really get the party started,
I couldn't do it.
- Don't.
- What's your problem, Leonard?
- It's a stupid idea, breaking into the bowling alley.
Not to mention dishonest, illegal, and totally uncool.
- The problem was, no one else agreed.
- Looks like you're the uncool one, Leonard.
- What's worse,
some unexpected visitors turned up at the bowling party.
I hadn't said anything, but when your dad's a cop
everyone thinks you've blabbed.
Curtis Ferraris wanted revenge.
Which is why that morning,
I chose to be as far away from him as possible.
No one would find me here.
No one even knew about this beach.
I was completely safe at last.
I don't know where she came from.
She appeared like magic,
scooping me up and taking me to safety.
- You okay?
- Thanks.
Wait!
- A mermaid?
I can't believe you saw a real live mermaid!
- I didn't, that's my point.
I was hallucinating.
I had been hit by my surfboard.
It does weird things to your head.
- What if you weren't hallucinating?
What if I told you that you really did see a mermaid?
- Then you'd be crazy!
But you already are, so nothing new.
- Why are you wearing three jumpers?
- You know, in case it gets cold.
- It's 25 degrees.
This is about Curtis, isn't it?
- No!
- If Curtis was going to have a go,
I figured a couple more layers might soften the blow.
Since his dad had started working as temporary chaplain,
school had become a dangerous place for Egg too.
- Freeze!
Our agreement, remember?
- She was supposed to pop in for a cup of tea,
and there she goes cleaning up again.
Did you see this?
It's called a coaster.
You have a cup of tea, and you grab this.
Pop it underneath.
She taught me that!
Isn't she a genius?
- No!
No public displays of affection, remember?
If anyone finds out about you two, my life is over.
- I know.
I'm swatting a fly.
- Mum didn't need to hide anything.
Apparently she was invisible.
And when you're trying to raise money
for a community radio station,
it can make things a bit difficult.
- Hi.
Hello there, my name's Joy Leonard
and I'm collecting for a very worth...
Must've been in a hurry, nevermind.
Hi, I'm Joy...
Deep breath, Joy.
Hello there, you look like someone who'd really appreciate
I'm not a rubbish bin.
- At that moment,
I wouldn't have minded being a garbage bin.
Anything but me.
Okay, enough hiding.
Go and talk to them.
Clear the air.
A nice, civilised grown-up discussion.
How hard can it be?
Probably should've worn a fourth jumper.
- Leonard.
Fancy meeting you here.
- Egg.
- Okay, so remember
that party of Curtis's I told you about?
Egg really wanted in with that crowd,
and he was majorly put out I didn't feel the same way.
- Yeah, Leonard's out.
- Come on, Lockie, say something.
- Hi.
Look, I know you think I blabbed.
But I didn't, and I wasn't
- Can you believe this wuss used to be a friend of yours?
- No.
- Leonard, you're late.
Get in now!
- I never thought I'd be so happy
to be stuck in a classroom doing algebra.
Even if I was trapped inside three jumpers.
- So all you young Einsteins, what have we got?
Let's say x equals 17, and y equals 14.
- Is this AD?
- Did you knock?
- Ian, is it?
- Sir to you.
You're the new girl.
- Melanie.
But don't bother learning my name, Ian.
I'll be out of here before you know it.
Have you ever considered wearing less brown?
- Why don't you take a seat, young lady?
I've got the perfect spot for you.
- Next to the octopus.
- Leonard.
You'll look after this charming young lady, won't you?
You two are sure to hit it off.
It was her, my mermaid.
- Don't leave her side until she knows the place.
- Can you stop staring at me?
- I'm not sure if I'm still dreaming or not.
- Apparently not.
- Girls toilets, here they are.
Do you want me to take you inside?
- I'm gonna go in here now.
I think you should leave,
before I scream and get you arrested.
- Good idea.
- Are you hiding in the girls' toilets?
- I'm showing the new girl around.
The one that helped me at the beach this morning.
- The mermaid!
Here, at our school?
- She's not a mermaid, believe me.
She's scary.
- Wow!
She's got land legs!
- Who's he?
- No one.
He's no one.
- Phillip Leonard.
Nice to meet you.
- We'd better hurry if you still want
a guided tour of the school.
- I'd just like to say how brave you are.
Doing what you're doing, coming here
from your world.
- Is he alright?
- I forgot to show her these bricks.
Great in hot weather, nice and shady.
- Why don't you just bash 'em up?
- Who?
- The guys you're hiding from.
- I'm not hiding.
- You are like an octopus, aren't you?
Arms and legs going everywhere, but no spine.
- Meanwhile,
Mum's day wasn't getting any better.
- Thank you!
Cha cha cha.
Ta ta, cha cha cha!
- Excuse me Sally, I don't mean to be rude
but I'm collecting here.
- There's plenty of room for both of us!
You're too kind!
Isn't it exciting?
There's a dance competition on the Gold Coast.
The whole of Angelus Ladies Club is entering.
- But why do you need donations?
You've got plenty of money.
- Not everyone in the club is as fortunate as I am.
We need to raise enough money to fly us all there.
Gee, the way we're going,
we might be able to go First Class!
- Bless you, my child.
- Bless you.
Seven eight, cha cha cha!
- I reckon we wait til after school to get him.
Then the teachers won't give us any grief.
What do you reckon, Egg?
- Sure.
- You do wanna get him, don't you?
- Yeah, of course.
- Gross!
Your dad's giving her one of his sandwiches.
- So?
- They must be like, a couple.
- No way!
Yuck, that's disgusting.
- Well why are they sharing lunch then?
- Maybe she forgot hers?
He's just giving her his sandwich.
It's a Christian sharing thing.
Jesus was always handing out bread.
- Dunno.
They look pretty cosy.
- No way, that would so never happen!
- I can't believe Egg!
Obviously, you have a major personality defect.
But you're still more fun to hang out with
than bogan Curtis Ferraris.
- Hi, Octopus Boy.
Caught anything?
- Just a couple of herring.
- They'll be much happier back there.
- What'd you do that for?
- Sorry about him.
He doesn't appreciate your affinity to other sea creatures.
- She just chucked our fish in the water!
You shouldn't even be here.
This is my beach.
- Your beach?
- Yeah, I discovered it.
- Have you told the fish?
Gotta let them know who's boss?
- He doesn't speak fish.
You could teach him!
- He's as weird as you are.
Bye, Octopus Boy.
- Did you see her move between habitats?
- What?
- From the water to land!
If I knew we could observe that transition,
we'd have an opportunity to see her tail morph into legs!
Scientifically speaking, there's nothing to suggest
that mermaids don't exist.
Their physiology is a natural Darwinian reaction
to their aquatic environment.
- Is there any chance you could be a bit less,
you?
- That night,
mom was wishing she could be a bit less her.
It was cha cha this, and cha cha that.
No one was interested in me.
- Maybe you need a costume too.
- That could work.
Maybe you could be a bit more assertive, Joy.
- You don't think I'm assertive?
What do you think, Lockie?
- Well, you don't want to be like an octopus.
- An octopus?
- You know, no spine, arms and legs going everywhere.
- Wow, listen to this!
A mermaid can survive on her land legs two weeks at a time,
but if she comes into contact with water while on land,
her tail will be exposed.
Water.
That's what I need to prove she's real!
- Who?
Phillip was on a mission.
Unfortunately, it clashed with my mission to stay alive.
- Okay, settle down.
As soon as the chaplain arrives, we'll head in
for our personal development workshop on you and your body.
- Your dad's taking this class?
- His girlfriend's taking the girls class.
- I told you, they're not a couple.
- Okay girls, line up to go inside.
Boys over here, you're in the library.
- Hey new girl.
You got any questions after this, you know who to come to.
- I've got one question.
Why are you in the girls line?
Woops!
Had a bit of an accident, did we?
- Curtis Ferraris.
I wouldn't expect that from a Kindergarten student.
Go home and get changed immediately.
- That was your brother, Leonard.
I won't forget this!
- Try salt water next time.
- Mum figured a costume
could give her an edge over Mrs. Streeton.
What emus had to do with community radio, I don't know.
But at least emus have spines.
- Help make Angelus Community Radio Station happen.
So you give to cha cha cha over there and not to me?
Angelus Community Radio Station!
Don't you like emus?
Emus are on our coat of arms!
Where's your patriotism?
Hey.
Come back here.
I can hear jingling in your pocket.
You've got money in there!
You give that to me right now!
- There's assertive, and there's just plain rude.
And sadly, I think you crossed that line.
- Sorry.
- Sorry?
- I'm sorry.
- You're sorry?
Well, I think you've learned your lesson.
- And I made $500!
- 500?
- The Chamber of Commerce gave me a check,
providing I don't go collecting in Angelus ever again.
Thanks, Sarge.
Chow, bird.
- When school finished,
I didn't have to hide from Curtis.
He was at home changing his trousers.
I decided to take advantage of this
and go and talk to Egg.
Not long ago, he'd been my best mate.
Surely we could sort something out.
- Hi.
Wow, this place is spotless.
Miss Archer's definitely having an impact around here.
- I was thinking we
- Hi.
I'm sorry about, pants.
- Get out.
- Okay, I'll just go.
- What'd he say about Miss Archer?
- Nothing.
- Your dad's going out with her isn't he?
Look, who's side are you on?
We're supposed to be mates but we're not, are we?
'Cause mates don't lie to each other.
Mates trust each other.
- Egg had come this far with Curtis.
He couldn't go back.
- I know where he'll go.
There's this beach he thinks no one else knows about.
- Thought you might like some company.
- Fight, fight, fight, fight, fight!
- Wait!
I had him first.
We've been fighting over this beach.
He reckons it's his turf.
I disagree.
Ever seen a blue ringed octopus?
Nasty little creatures.
One of the deadliest in the world.
Enough venom to kill 26 men.
One bite.
And the poison seeps through your body.
Every muscle is paralysed.
You wanna yell for help, but
you can't open your mouth.
- What are you gonna do with it?
- Put your hand in the bucket.
Just once, as fast as you like.
Chances are he won't bite you.
I gave him breakfast this morning.
If you survive, I'll give you your precious beach.
If you don't, well,
then you won't have to worry, will you?
Go on.
Hand in the bucket.
- I think I'd rather fight him.
- Nah, this is much more fun.
The bucket it is, Leonard!
- Bucket, bucket, bucket, bucket, bucket!
- Go on!
Die.
- What?
- Get on the ground and die.
- Run! Run!
- You can stop now.
You didn't hurt my crab, did you?
- He bit my finger!
What am I supposed to do now?
I can't stay dead forever.
- That's not my problem.
- I must've given
a pretty convincing performance,
because the next day, I was a hero.
- Clear a path everyone, let him through.
This guy has enough venom in him to kill 26 men.
- I guess that can happen
when you come back from the dead.
- You're alive!
- Apparently.
- I'm glad!
- Yeah, me too.
- It was kinda my fault.
I mean, I was the one who told Curtis about your beach.
- I'm going to look for a new beach to hang out at.
- Maybe I could help?
This weekend?
Curtis thinks you're a legend now!
He'll probably come too.
- Why would I want him to come?
- It wasn't that he told Curtis
where to find me, but after all this,
he still wanted to be friends with Curtis bogan Ferraris.
I couldn't be an octopus anymore.
- I think I'll look for a new beach on my own.
- And just like that,
Egg and me, best mates forever,
got a divorce.
As he walked away I wished like crazy
we could go back to how we used to be.
Hanging out in each other's back yards,
seeing how far we could spit watermelon pips,
laughing for so long we forgot what made us laugh
in the first place.
But that's the trouble, isn't it?
You can't go backwards.
- Sorry, that seat's taken.
- Not my problem.